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TotalBiscuit
59 quotes
“Okay, so tiny…Build's… Waaait a second…”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“What the 'ell just happened?!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I. Want. The. Hat!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Engaging Dance Mode!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Ladies and gentlemen, my name is TotalBiscuit. I'm here to ask and answer one simple question: W-T-F is Day One: Garry's Incident?" [Beat] "Garry with two R's, so you know he's serious.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“You hear them? Everyone instantly died. And I have no idea why.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Behold: my amazing fighting technique, passed down from generation to generation in the illustrious Garry line. Anyway, as I was saying…”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Oh look, everybody instantly died again! What the hell was that? What killed me?”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“What?! Where the hell did that come from?!" … "Behold! The worst textured panther in the history of video games!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“What the hell killed me?! I had half health! Why did I just immediately die?! I don't understand what's happening!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Maybe it has quick save?" [Silence.] "…No. Of—Of course, that would be asking too much.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“You better save regularly if you intend to play this, 'cause you will just…die. From anything! At random! With no prior warning!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I'm pretty sure that macaw is also…up to no good…”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Can I… WHAT?! Whaaaaat?! I hit him five times—three times in the back and he doesn't even know that I'm here!" [laughs] "Why is this game?! I'm not even gonna ask what is this game!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“What?! Now he realizes?! Oh—screw everything about this! I'm sorry; I can't take another minute of this dreadful thing!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“[groan] "I—It is—What is it with this year and awful video games?! We've had Ride to Hell: Retribution, and we've had this, and I don't know which is worse.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Behold! The Floating Aborigine Tribesman thingy! And his—”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“This is a full release…! This is a full release! It is not Early Access! This is not a beta, guys! Seriously, I am not lying to you! And this is after about three patches! This game is a f**king disaster!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“It is a wasted concept [by] a studio that evidently does not have the talent necessary to create something of this complexity, and my god did they screw it up! This is this year's Revelations 2012! And more to the point—it's even got a Revelations 2012 armgun! It's—[beat]—god…! It is…just…horrendously bad!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“This monkey is running backwards and forwards! This tribesman right here—" [starts swinging his machete in an attempt to get the tribesman's attention] "Hi.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Let me guess: if I stand up, he's gonna see me immediately?" [stands up; tribesman attacks him] "Of course.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“So, if all you do with WTF Is…? is to figure out whether or not a game is worth buying, you can just stop watching right now. It isn't. You should avoid it like the plague, because it is absolutely terrible. If you're curious as to why, however…" [chuckles] "Oh, I will show you.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“[demonstrating the pickpocket mechanic] "I kid you not. That's actually Garry's Incident level of terrible.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“[watching a character's ridiculous idle animation] "Who—? Nobody—Nobody does that!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Are you ready for the jumpscare? …No, you're not.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I now present to you the fairest maiden—what the hell is wrong with your face?”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Oh, fair maiden… If only I could fix the voids that exist in your fair…visage… Ugh!" [laughs incredulously] "That's one hell of a makeup accident.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Oh no—I can clip through the rock, too. You are f**king kidding me.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I think we may have found 2014's Garry's Incident. Ho-lee sh*t.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“'What do you think you're doing?! Helps to have a map!' Also, 'Can you find the missing parts of my face?'”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Don't even tell me about the map. Don't even. Where's the keyhole?”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“They didn't render a keyhole! …F**k!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“You were transparent a minute ago!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“We will not join enemy server." [catches himself] "'Enemy server', what? Let's try that again—empty server. I do want enemies.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“So. What's missing? Well, there's no crosshairs.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“…Why am I even whispering? It's not like they're actually gonna hear me.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“…So really, it's just y—" [enemy player kills him] "—oh, dammit!—you, your gun, and your friends.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Oh, goddamn! What the hell?!" [opens fire, then laughs] "Suppressing fire!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“[to a teammate, who just shot at him] "I[t]—Don't shoot me!" [chuckles] "What's wrong with you?”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“[about Phil Fish leaving the game industry] "My first reaction, when thinking about covering this, was just to finish by saying, 'NNNope!' and go straight onto the next segment.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“So to break down what they're saying there, they claim that they have run out of time and money.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“…Yeah, and that was just the damn start of it, because Ubisoft simply cannot shut UP!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“The last part of that statement is the only thing that's true.”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Ubisoft, I just want to like your games. Why won't you let me!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“WHAT?! YOU FFFFFFFfffffff…" [Silence.] "…I just lost. I just lost…!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Yes! It is—n-no! Nooo! NOOOOO! Why would you have that happen?! That was a win! Ahhhhhhhh!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“It's an Avenge?! Ahhhh! Oh, no! …I was bamboozled!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“…I am a stupid, stupid man. I am a very, very dumb person. I…" [laughs in self-deprication] "He has an Auchenai Soulpriest! Why would you do that?! What is wrong with you?!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Should've played the bloody Sky Golem. And now he's got my other one. Give it BACK!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“So far, the game has done a really good job of not throwing a lot of jumpscares at me, and that worries me even more. [goes to open door] If you blow your load too quickly with jumpscares—" [TB opens door. Cue jumpscare.] "AHHHHH! Jesus Christ. F**k! I hate you so much right now! God-dammit! Anyway!”
TotalBiscuit (1984–2018) said by 2018 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source