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Bob Monkhouse
16 quotes
“I'll never stop working. I want to die in the saddle. A day is wasted for me if I haven't done something even mildly creative.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I saw a specialist who asked me 'Are you familiar with the phrase faecal impaction?'. I said I think I saw that one with Glenn Close and Michael Douglas.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“When I said I was going to become a comedian, they all laughed. Well, they're not laughing now, are they?”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I'd like to die like my old dad, peacefully in his sleep, not screaming like his passengers.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“People who hadn't noticed me, or who had written me off as a game show host, started to reassess me. There were people who hadn't seen me as a stand-up artist and liked it. Suddenly I was in fashion again.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“The last time I was in Spain I got through six Jeffrey Archer novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper next time.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I can still enjoy sex at 74 - I live at 75, so it's no distance.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Silence is not only golden; it is seldom misquoted.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“People always say: "You're a comedian, tell us a joke." They don't say: "You're an MP, tell us a lie.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“No one watched it, not even the cameramen”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I've always known that I polarise opinion. Some people respond with enthusiasm and affection. In others, I awaken a lot of hostility.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Smarmy, plastic, oily, greasy, unctuous, shallow, superficial, old-fashioned, superannuated, crap”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I suddenly realised I could maybe occupy a different position because of age, a kind of acceptance.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“My father was ruined by hard drink - he sat on an icicle.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I was a born club comic. Radio and TV and stage were fine, but I found my real home in cabaret.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Although I have always loved the noise of laughter, I really can't fear the coming of quiet. As for funerals, I rather like them. Such nice things are always said about the deceased, I feel sad that they had to miss hearing it all by just a few days.”
Bob Monkhouse (1928–2003) said by 2003 at the latest wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source