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Bill Maher

202 quotes

“There are a helluva a lot of Americans trying really hard these days to embrace a new spirit of inclusion and self-reflection, and this progressive allergy to acknowledging societal advances is self-defeating because progress and hope that we can achieve it is the product we're selling and having a warped view of reality leads to policies that are warped. Black-only dorms and graduation ceremonies, a growing belief that Whiteness as a malady and White people as irredeemable, giving up on a colorblind society – only if you believe we've made no progress does any of that make sense.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“It's not a sin, and it's certainly not inaccurate, to say we've come a long way, baby. Not mission accomplished, just a long way.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Why do we allow the people who just want to bitch to always win?”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“The creative director of the entire shebang of the whole Olympics got shit canned because he once made a fat joke in a private conversation. This is called a purge. It’s a mentality that belongs in Stalin’s Russia. How bad does this atmosphere we’re living in have to get before the people who say cancel culture is overblown admit that it is in fact an insanity that is swallowing up the world?”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Young people have to stop flattering themselves that they're Nostradamus and would have foreseen, had they been around then, everything that's unacceptable now. And for further context Mel Brooks wrote one of the most successful musicals of all time around the song 'Springtime for Hitler.'”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“That is not a conservative position, my friends. My politics have not changed. But I am reacting to politics that have. And this is yet another example of how the woke invert the very thing that used to make the liberals liberal. Snitches and bitches? That's not being liberal.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“But liberals, as usual in this era, have now gone too far in the other direction, they under-romanticizing America. They have no perspective.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I’m sorry your professor said something you didn't like. That won’t be a problem with the Taliban because you're not allowed to go to school. In Saudi Arabia, grown women can be jailed for doing the kind of things we think of as routine without the permission of a male guardian. China rounds you up if you're the wrong religion and puts you in camps.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“If you think America is irredeemable, turn on the news or get a passport and a ticket on one of those sketchy airlines that puts its web address on the plane. There’s a reason Afghan mothers are handing their babies to us.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“We’re not the bad guys. Oppression is what we were trying to stop in Afghanistan. We failed, but any immigrant will tell you we’ve largely succeeded here. And yet, the overriding thrust of current 'woke' ideology is that America is rotten to the core, irredeemably racist from the moment it was founded and so oppressive, sexist, and homophobic we can't find a host for the Oscars or ‘Jeopardy!’”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“And this is where your new Afghan roommates that you took in will prove so valuable because they’ll turn to you and say ‘Have you people lost your fucking minds?!’ Have you ever heard of honor killings, public beheadings, throwing gay men off of roofs, arranged marriages to minors, state-sanctioned wife-beating, female genital mutilation, marriage by capture? Because we have.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“What’s the lesson of Afghanistan? Maybe it’s that everyone from the giant dorm room bitch-session that is the internet should take a good look at what real oppression looks like. Ask your maid, ask your Uber driver, ask the Asian woman giving you a massage.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“America may not be the country of your faculty lounge and Twitter dreams, but no one here tries to escape by hanging on to an airplane. No, we wait ‘til we get inside the plane to fight — and only because they cut off the beverage service.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“To me, when people say to me sometimes, like, ‘Boy, you really go after the left these days. Why?’ Because you're embarrassing me. That's why I'm going after the left in a way you never did before. Because you're inverting things that I- I'm not going to give up on being liberal! This is what these teachers are talking about. You're taking children and making them hyper-aware of race in a way they wouldn't otherwise be!”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I saw last night on the football game, Alicia Keys sang ‘Lift Every Voice and Sing,' which now I hear is called the Black national anthem. Now, maybe we should get rid of our national anthem, but I think we should have one national anthem. I think when you go down a road where you're having two different national anthems, colleges sometimes now have … many of them have different graduation ceremonies for Black and White, separate dorms -- this is what I mean! Segregation! You've inverted the idea. We're going back to that under a different name.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“There isn’t just one true opinion. I’m a free speech guy. Now, I’m Team Dave Chappelle, but that doesn’t mean I’m anti-trans. We can have two thoughts in our head at the same time.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Words have meaning, but not anymore. And when I hear 'transphobic,' 'phobic' has a meaning: Fear. I'm not transphobic if I merely disagree with you. It's not hate.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Now, if we establish right here at the beginning that all three of us are supporters of all laws that protect trans people, that we believe in all the dignity, equality, and respect that can be afforded to trans people, can we have an honest, free discussion about this?”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“One of the reactions from someone who worked at Netflix said, 'This is not an argument with two sides.' Well, right away you lost me. 'It is an argument with trans people who want to be alive and people who don't want us to be.' Well, that's just ridiculous. Dave Chappelle does not want you to not be alive.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“You know, you're not automatically right if you're trans. You're completely equal, you're just not automatically right and it doesn't behoove everybody to get their mind around very new changes, I mean, we were boy and girl for a very long time. It's only been 10 years since — how long have we had gay marriage, you know? I mean, talk about the Democratic voter, I'm sure there's a guy in Ohio going, 'I just got on board with gay marriage, could you give me a minute?'”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“This idea that we're not any gender when we're born is very new and very radical that you're born, it's just jump ball, you have a penis, it could mean you’re a boy That's a very new idea and I'm not sure if I'm down with all of it and I don't have to be.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“NPR said it sounds like Chappelle is using white privilege to excuse his homophobia and transphobia. Wait, now Dave Chappelle can have white privilege? I'm really confused now.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Also, vaccine? Mask? Pick one! You've got to pick. You can't make me mask if I've had the vaccine.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I travel in every state now, back on the road, and the Red states are a joy and the Blue states are a pain in the ass. For no reason”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“The world recognizes natural immunity. We don't, because everything in this country has to go through the pharmaceutical companies. Natural immunity is the best kind of immunity. We shouldn't fire people who have natural immunity because they don't get the vaccine. We should hire them. Yes?”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Well, Okay. But you know, people who've had it – I've had it. I mean, I shouldn't be tested anymore. I got the vaccine.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“The hospitalization rate for vaccinated is actually 0.01% and the rate for unvaccinated adults is 0.89%. So in both cases the correction answer is less than 1 percent. They [Democrats] thought it was over 50%. How do people, especially of one party get such a bad idea? Where did that come from?”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“We have to get back to life. I mean, you might look at the sporting events that are … all three sports are playing now including basketball, which is inside. Nobody seems to be having super-spreader events. I mean, you know, it was great. It was so much fun having a pandemic but, you know, buh-bye.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Just resume living. I know some people seem to not want to give up on the wonderful pandemic, but you know what? It’s over. There’s always going to be a variant. You shouldn’t have to wear masks.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Social justice warriors who are fond of governing by hashtag like to say that silence is violence. And we know that because it rhymes.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Word inflation is a problem. You can try to change reality by changing the words, but you can’t. It just stops you from dealing with it. One of the bad guys in Nineteen Eighty-Foursays, ‘The whole aim of Newspeak is to narrow the range of thought.’ It’s Orwellian, and Orwell never ends well.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“They [parents in Virginia] are not objecting to Black history being taught. There are other things going on in the schools… Like separating children by race, and describing them either as oppressed or oppressor. I mean, there are children coming home who feel traumatized by this. That's what parents are objecting to.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“My politics have not changed. I am an old school liberal… when we’re talking about the race issue, they changed, not me… We should be moving towards a colorblind society where we don’t see race. That is the old way to look at it. I think that is still a good way to look at. That how we win, when it doesn’t matter what your race is--the quality of your character, not the color of your skin. That’s not wokism. Wokism we have to see it everywhere all the time.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“But there is a reason why the term woke has come to signify going to far and doing things that make no sense. I keep saying this to the Democratic Party. The reason why you're so toxic is because you have become the party of no common sense.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Kids are taught and sometimes separated into groups, oppressor and oppressed. Again, does a kid even know what those words mean? Would they gravitate toward that if you hadn't told them? I mean, you're taking something that was getting better, race relations in America, and we -- I think everyone recognizes, everyone right-thinking, in my view, that still a lot of work needs to be done.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“You can't come up with good solutions unless you're realistic about what the problem is. I mean, it was only like 10 or 20 years ago that no state in America would vote for gay marriage. I mean, it was on the ballot like 35 times. Now it's the law of the land and no one is against it.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“[Cuomo]: It's just the truth, we're just telling them the truth, is that racism continues, it's systemic, it's in everything around us, but you have to be taught where it is everywhere because that's how we remedy it. And otherwise, you're just hiding from the truth." [Maher]: That’s nuts, it’s just silly, it’s just virtue signaling.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“So don’t put this into a this category ‘this is settled science’,.. anything that deviates from the one true opinion on this means you’re a some horrible bigot and transphobic. That is not what is going on here. I don’t think David Chappelle is transphobic… Maybe we are going too far with the children part of this. You know, kids should not be really making decisions about their gender.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“You're [Democrats] alienating a whole lot of people, particularly whites without a college degree, which is most of them in a country that is still 70% white. I'd say, 'Do the math,' but math is a form of white supremacy.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“A more pertinent question to ask about the word woke might be why in such a short time gone from a rallying cry to a pejorative. If the word only made you think of rational, deserved causes like teaching a less whitewashed version of American history, AOC would still want to own it. But it's a joke because it makes you think of people who wake up offended and take orders from Twitter. And their oversensitivity has grown tiresome.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“There is always going to be another variant. We cannot go on forever in permanent hair-on-fire, cancel Christmas, hand-jobs through a hazmat suit.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Beginning with recognizing what we are doing to kids is unnecessary and horrible, and I don’t even like kids. But making kids, where the Covid survivability rate of 99.98 percent, mask up like bandits. Unfortunately, the thing that is getting stolen is their education, their sanity, and their social skills. A study this week from a professor at John Hopkins concluded that the lockdowns we all suffered through had little impact on reducing COVID deaths. Okay, that’s kind of a big one to get wrong.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Last July, President Biden said, 'You’re not going to get COVID if you have these vaccinations.' Well, I already knew that was wrong then, and now we all do. The former Director of the CDC, Robert Redfield, believes COVID originated in a lab believes COVID originated in the lab, and now our intelligence agencies agree, it might have. But for months on social media, it was banned to even discuss it.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Look, I’m not saying the medical establishment isn’t trying to figure s**t out, or that they’re corrupt — although there is some of that, but how about just wrong? Wrong a lot. Wrong about HIV, wrong about lockdowns, wrong about kids, wrong about how you couldn’t get it if you were vaccinated.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“I’m just asking, how much wrong do you get to be while still holding the default setting for people who represent the science? Eat eggs, then don’t, then do. Take aspirin, then don’t, then do. The food pyramid, really? Bread and milk every day? Fifteen years ago, they were recommending trans fats. Now, they’re illegal, just like almost a hundred prescription drugs which were once called 'safe and effective' and then yanked off the market because they were not.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“But plainly, the medical-industrial complex has not earned the right to claim monopoly status on information about this virus or medicine in general. Yes, free speech has allowed people to hear misinformation sometimes. And a lot of it was yours.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Thank you all for coming and putting on a brave face. To Will Smith: Stay strong and I got your back… April Fools. You’re a d***. I'm not here to humiliate Will Smith. He gets enough of that at home.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Every single person in America was talking about the sucker punch heard 'round the world. That whole 'Keep my wife’s name out of your mouth' didn’t really work out.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“Then he sees that his wife is giving him the stinkeye. I blame toxic femininity. The Academy says from now on they may ban Will Smith from ever coming back to the Oscars, and my question: 'And what's the punishment?'”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source
“It exposed, I thought, a lot of aspects of this society we have which are not terribly positive — toxic masculinity, victim culture. Liberal hypocrisy, I think, was the big loser.”
Bill Maher (born 1956) wikiquote, CC BY-SA 4.0 source